Of course, I was flattered and excited at the prospect of dating this guy. Not only because—did I mention?—he was the cutest, most popular guy in school. But also because of the prestige that dating him would bring me. I would gain instant access to the “in crowd.” What I wanted more than anything was my picture prominently displayed on as many pages of my senior yearbook as possible!

Well, that wasn’t my highest goal. My highest goal had been set that summer. I had gone to a summer camp, where I committed my life for God to use however He wanted. I really meant it. And God immediately began working on me. I was dating a guy I knew God didn’t want me to date. So I broke it off with him. Then God made it clear the performing arts high school I attended wasn’t the place He wanted me. Leaving that school was hard, but I knew it was God’s will, and I knew His plans are better than mine. So I left six weeks into my junior year and transferred to my town’s public high school—the high school where the cutest, most popular guy asked me out.

Now, this happened two to three months after summer camp was over. The high from camp was dying down. My commitment to read my Bible every day was beginning to wane. The joy I felt over my newfound intimacy with God was being replaced with excitement about all that I could do and be in this new school—this school where the cutest, most popular guy had asked me out.

A True Friend
I’m ashamed to admit, but I didn’t even stop to think about whether or not this guy was a Christian. I definitely didn’t pray and ask God if I should date him. He was cute and popular, and he would be the center of many yearbook pictures, so what better place was there for me than by his side?

I’m thankful God protected me from myself. And He did it by using my best friend. Julie was a senior. She wasn’t a new student. She knew all about the school, the “in crowd” and the cutest, most popular guy. Julie was a spiritual inspiration to me, because she stood up for what she believed, even when doing that cost her a lot. Her faith was more important to her than pleasing other people. She had the opportunity to sit at the “cool table” at lunch, to hang out with the crowd I was working so hard to get into, yet she walked away. She ate lunch in the choir room with the Christian kids and chose to spend her weekends having fun in a way that didn’t destroy her body or cause her to dishonor God.

Julie saw me go out with this guy a couple times. She had also seen me go forward at the camp service that summer. She knew all about the commitment I had made. She knew the truth. And she loved me. But telling me that truth wasn’t easy. She knew I wouldn’t like what she had to say. She knew I could get angry and decide not to be her friend anymore. But she also knew it was worth the risk.

Julie sat me down and explained to me that this guy wasn’t a Christian. He had a reputation for dating many girls and having sex with most of them. He also drank and probably did drugs. And since I was new and no one knew anything about me, my reputation was being shaped by the people I chose to hang around. And while she knew I wasn’t having sex, drinking or doing drugs, everyone else assumed I was. They all knew the kinds of girls this guy dated, so they quickly lumped me into that group. Being popular wasn’t worth ruining my reputation and placing myself in situations that could tempt me to forget the commitment I had made just a few months before.

Julie made it clear that she was telling me this because she cared about me, because she wanted the best for me, because she wanted to hold me accountable to my promise to God. She told me because she wanted to protect me. And she did.

Turn Around
I stopped dating him. I started eating lunch in the choir room with the Christian kids, and I discovered they’re cool and fun, and they talk about things that really matter. I started reading my Bible again, praying about whom I should date and asking Julie to continue to keep me accountable. I realized that honoring God was so much more important—and fulfilling—than trying to get into the “in crowd.” My last two years of high school were amazing and exciting and full of great memories. Julie helped me protect my reputation and my relationship with God.

Proverbs 27:6 says, “Wounds from a friend can be trusted.” Sometimes the truth hurts. And none of us wants to hurt people we love. But if we stay silent, we could be allowing them to make terrible mistakes. The rest of that verse says, “But the kisses of an enemy are multiplied.” People who don’t love us may tell us what we want to hear. But they aren’t true friends. They allow people to make mistakes; they may even encourage them in making bad choices. Those “kisses” destruct. Better to tell the truth to our friends in order to protect them, even if that truth stings a little at first. Your true friends will thank you for it.